You know what I’m craving right now? Just a string of ten or twenty boring-ass, ho-hum days. Is that too much to ask? There’s not nearly enough ho-hum in my world right now. Every week is chaos, at work and at home, and I just can’t seem to find my ho-hum mojo. Ya know? Pass the beer nuts.
The brakes nearly went out in Toney’s car last week. I drove it for two days like that — didn’t want her in that death trap — and had to mash the pedal all the way to the floor to get it to stop. We took it to a garage that’s part of a chain, and received a $600 to $700 estimate. They said the entire brake system needed to be replaced, more or less.
Funk dat. All those guys look like they’re coming off a four-day drunk, which is not necessarily a deal-breaker. But at a chain you expect a little more attention to employee appearance. Ya know? It’s a jarring experience, walking into that place and seeing five or six Bad Santas hanging around. Toney gives them some leeway, but I’ve always been skeptical. Something just doesn’t smell right, both figuratively and literally.
So, we took it to an independent garage in Scranton, a place that was recommended to us. They’re friendly and honest, we were told. And they fixed it for $158. One of the brake lines was corroded from salt and brine on the winter roads, and everything else was fine. Nothing to do with the master cylinder, or any of the other stuff that was mentioned by the first place. Grrr… I wish it wasn’t necessary to carry around so much distrust. But, if you don’t, you’ll get bent straight over a chesterfield.
Also, I attempted a DIY project in our upstairs bathroom. Yeah, and it didn’t work out… Every time I mention that I paid a person to fix a problem, it’s just an avalanche of super-haughty “Why didn’t you do it yourself?!” comments here. So, I thought I’d give it a shot. Thanks!
Why don’t I do things myself? Because I don’t know how, am not interested in knowing, and am now so goddamn irritated I’d gladly fight a pack of howler monkeys. That’s why.
For the record: I’m out close to fifty dollars in parts at this point, as well as an entire weekend day, and our shower is fucked six ways to sunset. If I turn on the water up there, it’ll probably come out of the electrical outlets, like on the Three Stooges.
Also… I attempted to watch Adam Carolla’s new movie, Road Hard, on-demand last week. It was on the menu — $6.99 to rent, $12.99 to own — but, no can do. When I clicked the rent button, I got an error message that said I’m not subscribed to that movie group. WTF?? What does that even mean?
Screw it. I just won’t watch it. I literally don’t have it in me to investigate that bullshit. So I’ll just rent the DVD someday. Or not. It doesn’t matter anymore. Nothing works. Nothing at all. Bring on the monkeys!
Speaking of Carolla, this guy was on his show last week. I’d never heard of him, but his song gave me one of the biggest laughs of the week. Be careful where you watch it, but definitely don’t skip the thing. Great, great stuff. Complete with a poignant ending.
On Friday I had a health screening at work. Turns out… I’m fat. Yes, I was rocked back on my chubby heels by that news. Who knew?! Everything else checked out, though. Blood pressure, cholesterol, blood sugar were all where they were supposed to be. I just need to drop the equivalent of a fourth grader, or somesuch. And I’ll get right on that.
On a happier note, I successfully waited out Daylight Savings Time and the clock in my car is now correct again. Ha! I never changed it during the Fall Back era, and now that we’re into Spring Forward, all is right with the world. The clock here in the bunker is wrong, though. It’s an hour behind. Haven’t decided how I’m going to handle that situation yet… It’ll require me to take it down, turn the dial on the back, and line up the nail in the wall with the tiny hole on the back of the clock. I’m not sure I’m emotionally prepared for such an ordeal.
Now I’m going to drive our son back to school, which is about three hours each way. Then I have to stop by work for a couple of hours. Yes, it’s quite a life I’ve carved out for myself.
What’s going on with you guys? Anything new? Please bring us up to date on it in the comments.
And I’ll see you again soon.